Granny's 90th Birthday Party

Granny's 90th Birthday Party, Elk Lake, Saturday, August 4, 2007
We celebrated Granny's 90th birthday this year at the annual Elk Lake gathering. It served as the focus for a family reunion, the likes of which we haven't seen for many years. Family members and friends gathered from around the country to celebrate and renew acquaintances.

Miss Bay City hams it up at 90

Craig's memories
We are definitely blessed with a wonderful family. We don't all get together very often, but when we do there is guaranteed to be a great time for all. We used Granny's 90th birthday as an excuse this time. The Cabin was the location, which is by far the best resort in the world. Just counting family we had over 40 in attendance (and there were a lot of friends, in addition). As you can tell by the pictures we had lots of food, lots of games, and lots of adventures. The family started arriving on Thursday and most were gone by Monday. Saturday was the big party followed by a canoe trip on Sunday. We filled 20 canoes going down the river. There were many memories made and stories will be told for many years. Here are just some of the highlights:

•Tent city: There were at least five tents pitched across the cabin grounds, two motor homes and a booked motel.
•Dad and Mom with their garbage can dinner: You put everything in a new garbage can and bring it to a boil over the camp fire. The catch was that Dad has a tradition of his own and has thrown many a meal, only on special occasions, on the ground. Yes, he was successful again.
•The crew went missing: After some time Ardith said that Pat had been gone quite a while in their jetboat. She asked Dad and I to go find them. As we paddled out in the canoe and went around the far end of the lake, we found a couple of guys just floating around in their dead boat. Dad and I towed them back to the dock.
•Dad came down to the campfire at some early hour of the morning to tell us to turn down the radio (AGAIN). I have never seen a group of adults (maybe very drunk) all gathered in a group and whispering quite so loudly, “SHHHHH, MAYBE HE WON'T SEE US.” It was amazing to see Charlie come from a tent, dive through the air, and hit the off button in under 10 seconds. The funniest thing was a little while later when Uncle Greg snuck up to the camper and came down with a flashlight pretending to be Dad. People went diving everywhere, even trying to hide behind the folding chairs. I had one Uncle that was relieving himself by the flagpole that ran off into the woods, never stopping the stream. That was funny. Dad used the old red horn to wake up the drunks the next morning. Weren't they looking good first thing in the morning?
•Mike passed out at the campfire: He said that he had wanted to stay down there after everyone went up. He found himself still sitting all by himself the next morning. He was a little bit on the cold side.
•Uncle Rick and I got frisked at Wal-Mart: I guess that they are not used to people pushing out two carts of beer. It was enough for one night.
•Dad and Mom flipped their canoe with Granny in it. Granny ended up staying in the canoe, just getting her hair wet. Talk about a grip!
•The boiling of corn is a tradition passed down from the Brewer side. The popping of corn (in the same giant kettle) was a bit exciting for even the adults.
•Marjorie was in all of her glory “the morning after” floating in the canoe. When we passed by her she had her head down on the bow waiting for the river to quit spinning.
•Dancing on the porch: Dad was in lead taking everyone around the tables. Granny was dressed in her beauty queen outfit.
•Blowing up cans of corn in the campfire: A new sporting event.
•Five generations from Granny, Mom, Missy, Chloe, and me.
•The beanbag toss that every now and then the children were allowed to play.
•Looking: Looking for the dog, looking for the camera, and looking for granny.
Definitely a good time!

Tennessee Anaconda

Yes, it was another day in the life of Craig and Connie. Shortly after I left home to help a firefighter with his hardwood floor, I got a call from Connie. She said that I was to return home immediately, that there was a snake in the house. So after the guys made fun of the call, I headed home. When I got home it was quite obvious that Connie was shaken up. She said that it was laying behind the couch at first and she thought that I had put it there as a joke. Then it moved. It went into the bedroom and into the closet. So I picture the walk-in closet with a thousand shoes and miscellaneous items. Trying to find a snake in there was going to take a while. When I opened the door things changed! The "snake" threw one of my shot guns to me because he wanted to give me a fair fight. The first thought could be wrapped up with "SH**"! I got a flashlight to size things up while Connie retrieved the grill tongs as my first reality weapon after I ruled out the shot gun due to the mess and damage to the house. It had a narrow head, so my first thought was "not poisonous". The head and tail were on the floor behind one of my gun cases. I noticed that the body went over the top of the gun case. You see the gun was standing on end. The diameter of the body at the top of the gun case was roughly one and a half inches. I took the tongs and began a slow but calculated move towards the head. A loud rattle was then heard. My heart, which now had met the stain in the underwear, had quit working. The hair on my back and up to my head stood up. "Rattler" was the new incoming message to the brain. Time to regroup....

Connie began to look up "HELP" in the phone book. After a deep thought and a call to my buddy, Hunter, I realized that this could not be a rattlesnake and that what ever kind of snake it was, it's tail was wiggling and hitting the gun case and wall. Bigger weapons were needed. While trying to keep my voice from breaking, I calmly asked Connie to go out to the shed and get a clawed hoe. Bless her heart. You see Connie's biggest fear is the wasp. There are wasps in the shed. She brought in about every tool in the shed except the one I asked for. I could have planted a garden. Finally she retrieved what I had asked for. While she was cleaning out the shed, I had managed to grab the snake by the head about three times. Each time it pulled free. When Connie returned, she asked if she could hold the light for me. She was shaking so bad that she could have threaded a sewing machine while it was running. I didn't figure that would be much help. Besides, I wanted a witness that could tell the story if things went wrong. I struck, the snake struck, I struck, the snake struck. I realized that he was better at this than I was. You might think that I am crazy, but I believe this snake had watched a TV show about rattlesnakes. I managed to pin his body about three inches down from the head with the hoe. Connie then grabbed the gun case and I put the tong on his head. Between the two of us we managed to get the snake out of the house and onto the front porch. Connie held the snake down with the hoe while a got the shovel and cut the life out of the monster. We did find that it had the neighbors Pit Bull in his stomach. The actual length after the calm had began to settle was five feet.

I took him over to the firefighters house and showed the boys. As I dragged him in, one of the guys dove for the door. The others were in quite a bit of shock. They decided that Connie had actually been pretty calm when she called.

How did it get in? I really feel that it could have opened the door and walked in. If it could have talked, it would have told us to get out. The only other thing was that I changed out the seal on the front screen door before I left. I took the seal off which left about a one inch gap, took the seal into the garage and changed out the rubber strips, then took it back in and put it on. It must have been watching me work. So if you have any doubts, I can tell you that there are Anaconda's in Tennessee.

Love,

Craig and Connie